Tuesday, December 21, 2004
Yo..still sick. and stuck at home. what the fuck man. Spitting, coughing..lungs hurt..then now the stomach muscles hurt. cos cough too much..its cramped recently even. at night must always wake up, cough out the phlem then go toilet..lost count how many times i've done that. Dunno why the medicine doesn't seem to work..just hope i can get well and go to shawna's christmas party. The councillors all havin fun now at the camp while i'm here sick and bored. Do jian bao? sure i'll finally start on it. Later. The past few days have been quite unpleasant. spent my time thinking.yup. thinking. Charlene's with wei jian now! There was the first shock man..he was wearing a ring, same as charlene's one.. I knew once i saw their msn nicks. My god, wondered when he started liking her.but nvm. Now comes second shock. Ben chow they all all knew about it long ago. At the chalet they all knew, but no one told me. someone told me wj went out to meet her that night at 3am. woo..wonder what they did. asked ben chow to confirm then he say he not fang bian say. then finally he say. then i asked him why nv tell me, he say cos i didn't ask. what kind of fucking reason is that? And when i ask then he say not fang bian say? what the fuck? U dumb or sometting?! Then i asked him "so all this is just my luck eh?" and he actually said "ya sumthing lik that." insensitive asshole. I guess they just wanted to keep it from me, cos scared i turn into the hulk or something. Stupid. This brought back the memories of those times. damn i sure was lousy. my fault that everything turned out that way. Just becos u love someone, doesn't mean u 2 will get along tat easily. It takes 3 decades! which is precisely why i made tat decision. and so fast she now wif my good fren all lovey-dovey. khai says she wans to spite me. is she? even if she is, who cares man. no one earns anything from that, do they? But i still couldn't sleep, sick and pissed at ben chow for being that insensitive asshole that he is. No one understands how i feel. Shawna and vicki always talk so loud..I could hear them the whole time durin the meeting that day, talking bout me bein upset bout wj and ac and things lik tat. Maybe god gave me great ears or they're just too loud! I was a lil upset cos of ben chow and cos of what the rest did. Celine used the right word. Betrayed. hhaha. but nvm, i've gotten ova this shit. Celine's going to turkey for christmas. lucky gal. damn, 1 less person to talk to online. After all tis shit.. think i'm going to be single whether like it or not. cos i'm the kind of fucker in those tv shows who take their own sweet time before they finally confirm whether they like a person or not. i just can't change it. Right now no one on my radar. Just be frens. Adam's gonna take the same route as me afte what aslinda did to him too. Girls at this age. Can't stand them, really.. Cause so much shit to happen. waiting for the day when my blog can become like xiaxue's... she's writing the truth all the time n not afraid of ppl reading while i'm here writing, hoping not many people read it and downsizing my criticisms of others so much. Don wan enemies. Blogging seems to be getting really big these days..couging again. i've coughed and gone to the toilet to spit for at least 3 times while typing this. The medicine is running out already.. 4.30 must eat it. When can i get well? I want to get well! please! K gonna start doin jian bao now. bye. till Christmas..
3:17 PM
spongebobbbbbbbbbed
