Saturday, February 12, 2005
rock bottom refers to my mood now..
i regret talking to ice queen..try to be fren de mah. but then kenna suan till lik tat. hao ming was rite. but i think she is born lik tis de, can't sense any ill intentions from her. maybe she didn't get what i was trying to say. i just feel that using love to describe the relationship between frens of same sex, brothers, sisters, parents and children, friends, is wrong..its not the same feeling as that of u and a person of another gender. whereas the rest are about the same. or maybe cos i dun feel much towards the rest other than friends and the special person i like. i nv met anyone who could suan lik that. truly powerful. pei fu. then again she's quite funny, especially that last part. i think she pissed wif me. who wouldn't. just wanna say sorry here. why do i sound so weak. cos i am.. down and depressed. wrong day to talk to ice queen i think. hm.. ice queens sounds mean. let's think of another name. J ba. J contains no negative or positive meaning behind it. i won't get fired for my comments lik the other unfortunate bloggers too. J, my english sucks. i know le. u realli showed me. i will motivate myself. i think that's what u want to to do, but just in a mean way. but i think u're born lik tis, rite? can feel u not even trying to be mean yet. or maybe u are and u hate me, and i dunno that u hate me. maybe. but nvm. after talking to u J, i felt lik crying. finally know how the others that i've been mean to, have felt. was i purposely being mean to them? i guess i was, just for what i tot was humour. black humour i would say. and here u came, J, effortless suaning me and i feel like i've been hit by an mrt. "why r u so emotional and typing this crap?" is prob the question the readers are saying now when they're reading this, laughing at me. I'm sorry. I'm just born like tis, emotional, pessimistic, crappy. I jus wanna fa xie what i feel here, dun wanna keep it inside. i'm feeling down damn it, give me a break.laugh at me? Don read if u think its crap. not meant for just u anyway. do u dare to type out how u feel here and show it to the rest of the world? do u even dare to cry you lowlife? what's so funny about a person feeling down and remorseful? maybe i should ask myself these questions after all that i've done to them. i'm gonna try to be a better person. ya and eat more vegetables to have strong legs, according to what i heard from others today. LEt it be..say ya qin. i agree. keep my comments to myself. ya that's what mei lan and freda tried to teach me before. thanks ger i understand now..i must be a better person..thanks to those who are trying to understand what i'm typing or just simply sympathise me. thanks. i go watch jay chou vcd. thanks. bye..
11:19 PM
spongebobbbbbbbbbed
